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Women in general are confusing but Thai women..... lol
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  1. #1
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    Women in general are confusing but Thai women..... lol

    Hello everyone

    I'm new to the site, membership has been stimulated by a relationship I had with a lovely Thai lady from Songkhla Province.

    To try and cut it down to a paragraph, we met, fell in love, get on great, lots of talking, laughing, cooking all the things that make for a lasting relationship. There are some things that I woulnd't mind hearing your thoughts on though. She tells me that her father and family are very traditional, which I like, they all go to the temple on a regular basis, no problem there either, however, we are both 35 years old but she wants me to wait for her for a year or so, she is reluctant to tell me what it is she wants to do in this time. Before anyone jumps on the bandwagon with negativity, I know she is at home with her family and she has mentioned wanting to spend more time in her studies of Buddhism and going to the temple. Anyone care to share their thoughts about this in respect to her traditional family values and do Fathers in Thailand exert excessive pressure, rule with an iron fist so to speak. Could there be an element of fear in introducing a ferang into the mix ?

    Thanks

    The Gas Man

  2. #2
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    Re: Hi All, women in general are confusing but Thai women..... lol

    Quote Originally Posted by gasman View Post
    She tells me that her father and family are very traditional, which I like, they all go to the temple on a regular basis, no problem there either,
    Why would you like the family to be very traditional?, It's going to mean inflexibility and them not respecting your culture, in other words it's there way or the highway, you will need to change your fundamental belief in religion and thinking in life to satisfy her family if that was the case.
    That of course is just speculation and the family may not be as bad as you make out, but it seems your girlfriend is afraid for you to meet her family as you will not be up to there traditional expectations, the hardest one will be your not racially Thai.
    Of course we don't know the real reason why she is holding back and what ever we say is speculation, your girlfriend is obviously hiding something, maybe she is not that into you, maybe she not like the idea of marriage, some people prefer relationships as just boyfriend and girlfriend, maybe she like you but does not consider you the persion she wants to marry, she possibly still looking on the side, maybe she wants a Thai.
    Personally if you are the marrying type, then don't put all your eggs in the one basket, keep her and play the field at the same time as she may never be your bride.

  3. #3
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    Re: Hi All, women in general are confusing but Thai women..... lol

    If she makes you happy then that's great, but something ain't kosher if the girl is 35 and still wants to wait. What is she waiting for? Let's get the whole story. Tell us, does she have kids? She ever been married? Ever previously involved with foreigner? If so, how long? What does she do for a living? Does she still live with Mom & Dad? Details man. We need more information to work with.
    "Random Witty Comment"

  4. #4
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    Re: Hi All, women in general are confusing but Thai women..... lol

    HI

    thai women usually know from day 1 if they want to be with you in long term relationship.
    she might just be playing the field right now , not wanting to commit sort of like haveing her cake and eating it too.

    Most thai fathers do not rule with an iron fist.
    but their children are much more respectful of their wish's and desire's than american kids
    thai's do not want to offend or hurt parents, so seldom go against their wish's

    going to temple is not a problem buddist are much more forgiving and are not dogmatic about it if you attend or not is no big deal not like many christian and islam religions where you have to convert to marry

  5. #5
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    Re: Hi All, women in general are confusing but Thai women..... lol

    Sounds to me like so many ladies, particularly many of those found in Thailand.
    Once, twice, even three times bitten, shy forever more.
    Only you know her, so how much patience you are ready to muster to your cause is entirely your decision.
    Good luck.
    To be happy with where you are, first be happy with who you are.

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    Re: Women in general are confusing but Thai women..... lol

    Thanks for your replies, the last one in particular has raised a point that I hadn't considered which could certainly have some merit. In my opinion she's worth waiting for.

    Cheers

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    Re: Women in general are confusing but Thai women..... lol

    Quote Originally Posted by gasman View Post
    Thanks for your replies, the last one in particular has raised a point that I hadn't considered which could certainly have some merit. In my opinion she's worth waiting for.

    Cheers
    What about if she has no intention of marriage, you may be waiting forever.

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    Re: Women in general are confusing but Thai women..... lol

    Quote Originally Posted by paul_au View Post
    ...Of course we don't know the real reason why she is holding back and what ever we say is speculation, your girlfriend is obviously hiding something, maybe she is not that into you, maybe she not like the idea of marriage, some people prefer relationships as just boyfriend and girlfriend, maybe she like you but does not consider you the persion she wants to marry, she possibly still looking on the side, maybe she wants a Thai...
    Hi gasman, in my own opinion I seriously think you should take note of what paul_au had just mention above....

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    Re: Women in general are confusing but Thai women..... lol

    A year or so, what the? so your saying she wants to be apart for this "up in the air" period of time? I think time will tell in your case. I wouldnt be happy about it and I dont think to many would. Did she just tell you this out of the blue?

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    Re: Women in general are confusing but Thai women..... lol

    Hmmm,

    Man asks for no negative comments and what does he get....

    I would not know for sure what she is waiting for. There could be issues in the family that need resolving. She may want to make sure her parents are comfortable and able to care for themselves.

    The other side of the coin, is that she had a relationship with a crude, and is not willing to commit so fast. She might be checking you out, and wanting to see the caliber of man that you are. Ok you had a good time, you had fun, and enjoyed each other, but are you just playing on vacation, or are you serious about the relationship.

    Time tells all things.... If you take your time, you will know the truth. I would not rush, I would not rush her. She has her reasons, and they are hers, and given time, she might share them with you. She might have been married before and does not know how to explain it. She may be in the midst of a divorce... I know that my wife (Thai) has problems explaining some things...

    She is very shy about some issues, and I am learning to allow her the space to feel comfortable. Us Americans want to resolve everything. There are times we need to take a time out, and allow people of other ethnic backgrounds thier cultural space. What I have found with my wife.. She will tell me, but when she is comfortable...

    So, like I have said before and I believe - once involved in Thailand... the adventure has begun, and the outcome will not be what you expect.... relax and enjoy...

    Kirk aka Mouserkm

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