PHP Warning: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is no longer supported, use preg_replace_callback instead in ..../includes/class_bootstrap.php(433) : eval()'d code on line 110
When to "Wai" - Page 6
Page 6 of 7 FirstFirst ... 34567 LastLast
Results 51 to 60 of 64

Thread: When to "Wai"

  1. #51
    Join Date
    Feb 2008
    Location
    Blue Ridge Mountains, USA
    Posts
    5,007
    Thanks
    6,185
    Thanked 3,211 Times in 1,966 Posts

    Re: When to "Wai"

    Tod-Daniels You really make some valid points here and say many things I heartfully agree with. It is totally against my grain to pay deference to someone just because they have more money or social ranking than I. However, when in Rome and all that jazz . . . . .

    I believe an eccentric single farang man with no family or work ties may be considered, well, an eccentric farang man, and be allowed certain liberties in Thailand, but definitely not someone living within a family circle and community where his/her spouse has been known their entire life.

    I believe there are many here, like myself, who agree with Billk: "The only thing I would want to change about wai-ing is to take the pee-nong bit out of it so it doesn't matter who goes first. Then I would be happy for it to become universally compulsory."

  2. The Following 4 Users Say Thank You to Susana For This Useful Post:

    emu (28-07-15), fileeep (17-07-15), Khun Don (07-07-15), RickThai (08-07-15)

  3. #52
    Join Date
    Feb 2008
    Location
    Blue Ridge Mountains, USA
    Posts
    5,007
    Thanks
    6,185
    Thanked 3,211 Times in 1,966 Posts

    Re: When to "Wai"

    Tod, no doubt you have seen quite a few changes since you first arrived in Thailand 11 years ago. I'm curious to know if you came for a short visit first, or was that intended to be a short visit which turned into 11 years? Was the reason you first came the same as the reason you stay?

    Not many members that I know of have such a long history living in Thailand as you have. My personal history goes back to early 1970. I either lived in Bangkok (Thonburi specifically) or traveled to and from regularly. Other than traveling for business reasons (my own business), which we combined with family visits, all my time there revolved around Thai family life, teaching, etc., so I've not been exposed to much of Thai life as an individual.

  4. The Following User Says Thank You to Susana For This Useful Post:

    David_Loves_Ubonwan (07-07-15)

  5. #53
    Join Date
    Jul 2006
    Location
    N/A
    Posts
    7,491
    Thanks
    4,204
    Thanked 3,588 Times in 1,854 Posts

    Re: When to "Wai"

    Quote Originally Posted by Susana View Post

    I believe there are many here, like myself, who agree with Billk: "The only thing I would want to change about wai-ing is to take the pee-nong bit out of it so it doesn't matter who goes first. Then I would be happy for it to become universally compulsory."
    I think this captures the essence of being polite or respectful to others. During our pre-departure
    orientation as scholars to study abroad, the reality of cultural differences was hammered hard into us. We were made to understand clearly that we were going to another country whose customs and traditions might be totally different from ours. That the people we would meet might be 'weird', or full of imperfections. But that we should remember that those people might also be thinking that we're the ones weird!

    Being tolerant and respectful to others is therefore the way to go. I agree with Theodore Roosevelt that Politeness [is] a sign of dignity, not subservience. And we accord respect to others not for what they are but for what we are.

  6. The Following 9 Users Say Thank You to Marie For This Useful Post:

    billk (10-07-15), Curt (08-07-15), David_Loves_Ubonwan (07-07-15), emu (08-07-15), fileeep (17-07-15), Khun Don (17-07-15), mikeheart (07-07-15), RickThai (08-07-15), Susana (07-07-15)

  7. #54
    Join Date
    Jun 2014
    Location
    USA
    Posts
    1,175
    Thanks
    1,270
    Thanked 860 Times in 506 Posts

    Re: When to "Wai"

    I agree with Theodore Roosevelt that “Politeness [is] a sign of dignity, not subservience.” And we accord respect to others not for what they are but for what we are.
    Well stated and well researched!

    RickThai

  8. The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to RickThai For This Useful Post:

    emu (28-07-15), fileeep (17-07-15), Marie (09-07-15)

  9. #55
    Join Date
    Dec 2006
    Location
    ا෾
    Posts
    593
    Thanks
    31
    Thanked 521 Times in 294 Posts

    Re: When to "Wai"

    Quote Originally Posted by Susana View Post
    I believe an eccentric single farang man with no family or work ties may be considered, well, an eccentric farang man
    Hey, HEY, Susana, easy there.. I resemble those remarks(as well as take exception to being called a type of fruit!) I won't let thais call me that word without calling them on it, so it's definitely not something I tolerate comin' out of the mouths of foreigners here.

    Quote Originally Posted by Susana View Post
    I'm curious to know. . . .
    Alas Susana, my torrid tale of how I washed up here in the glorious "Land 'O Thais" and managed to make it 11 years, would bore your readers to tears. :

  10. The Following User Says Thank You to Tod-Daniels For This Useful Post:

    Susana (17-07-15)

  11. #56
    Join Date
    Jun 2008
    Location
    Port Hedland
    Posts
    1,273
    Thanks
    1,308
    Thanked 1,285 Times in 555 Posts

    Re: When to "Wai"

    Quote Originally Posted by Marie View Post
    I think this captures the essence of being polite or respectful to others. During our pre-departure
    orientation as scholars to study abroad, the reality of cultural differences was hammered hard into us. We were made to understand clearly that we were going to another country whose customs and traditions might be totally different from ours. That the people we would meet might be 'weird', or full of imperfections. But that we should remember that those people might also be thinking that we're the ones weird!

    Being tolerant and respectful to others is therefore the way to go. I agree with Theodore Roosevelt that “Politeness [is] a sign of dignity, not subservience.” And we accord respect to others not for what they are but for what we are.
    Well said Marie.....
    The best time to plant a tree was 20 years ago. The second best time is now.
    - Chinese Proverb

  12. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to fileeep For This Useful Post:

    Marie (18-07-15), RickThai (20-07-15)

  13. #57
    Join Date
    Dec 2006
    Location
    ا෾
    Posts
    593
    Thanks
    31
    Thanked 521 Times in 294 Posts

    Re: When to "Wai"

    I try to follow the old adage my grandfather told me "Courtesy doesn't take a college degree, but respect has to be earned not just given."

    Of course he also related "
    xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
    I am courteous, and never outright rude. I admit I sure dance close to that line, but I'm 100% born, bred, corn-fed American.

    I know existing within the family dynamics especially when a foreigner is in the mix, comes with it's own set of rules.. I think because I'm single, have no thai significant other, (although a TON of thai friends), that my experiences, who I am, how I act, how I relate to thais aren't nearly as restrictive. I don't have a "thai-in-tow" who speaks for me in situations. It was either learn to speak, communicate with these people or die here.

    Granted I do have some "hard bark" on me and most thais who've invested the time it takes to really know me would say I am a ҡ㨴 kinda guy. Coarse, ruff, gruff but totally a stand-up guy who tries to do what I say I'll do.

    I half jokingly / half seriously told someone, "I heard the wai is given as a sign of respect. Believe me, as soon as I meet someone here I respect, I give you my solemn promise I'll wai them.." <- that was said tongue firmly planted in my cheek
    That was an off-colour joke; not acceptable in this site. Please watch the material you post here. Thanks.-TQA Mods
    Last edited by Marie; 24-07-15 at 08:42 AM.

  14. #58
    Join Date
    Jun 2014
    Location
    USA
    Posts
    1,175
    Thanks
    1,270
    Thanked 860 Times in 506 Posts

    Re: When to "Wai"

    Going through life adhering to your own set of standards and values is good, but in a country like Thailand I am surprised someone hasn't inadvertently "lost face" due to your abruptness and (in the eyes of some Thais) rudeness and taken you to task.

    Back when I was living in Thailand (back in the mid-70s) it wasn't all that unusual for a foreigner to get cold-cocked or even shot or stabbed if they ignored Thai social protocol and upset a local.

    Perhaps you live in a more sanctified community.

    RickThai

  15. #59
    Join Date
    Oct 2002
    Location
    Bengalooru, India
    Posts
    1,504
    Thanks
    382
    Thanked 361 Times in 251 Posts

    Re: When to "Wai"

    I would wai to a person because of his or her position. If a go to a village and the chief meets I will wai. Or a teacher. Or a elder. Because that is a sign of expectations put on the person too in society. Just because these days we feel that most do not live that level, does not mean we should not expect that and not pay our respect to that position for what it is meant to be.
    Last edited by trangam; 24-07-15 at 01:29 AM.
    Never hit someone below the belt; for you are not the creator.

  16. The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to trangam For This Useful Post:

    emu (25-07-15), RickThai (24-07-15), Susana (24-07-15)

  17. #60
    Join Date
    Jun 2014
    Location
    USA
    Posts
    1,175
    Thanks
    1,270
    Thanked 860 Times in 506 Posts

    Re: When to "Wai"

    ^
    I think many Thais have the concept of waiing to a person because of his/her position ingrained into them from early childhood.
    I think trangam's statement
    Just because these days we feel that most do not live that level, does not mean we should not expect that and not pay our respect to that position for what it is meant to be
    shows that many Thais understand that sometimes the person in the position may not deserve respect, but in an effort to show respect for the position, they will still wai. I think this highlights the goodness and tolerance that is in so many Thai peoples hearts.

    That is why I have so much respect for the majority of the Thai people.


    RickThai

  18. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to RickThai For This Useful Post:

    emu (25-07-15), mikeheart (24-07-15)

Thread Information

Users Browsing this Thread

There are currently 1 users browsing this thread. (0 members and 1 guests)

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •